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Rewriting My Telenovela Without a Male Lead
Lorena Banda
April 11, 2025
Hey Chicas! 💋
I know I know please don’t be mad. I didn’t send out a newsletter last month. 🥲 But I hope you enjoy April’s newsletter. 💖
ON TODAY’S NEWSLETTER WE’LL GO OVER:
💋 Affirmation of the day
🌟 Decentering men
🍑 Sex toy of the month
🗳 Political pussy
💁🏻♀️ Day in the life
Affirmation of The Day ✨
Let’s Get Into It…
My boyfriend and I had a conversation a couple of months ago about how I’ve been too focused on the relationship and on him and not enough on myself. I honestly didn’t realize I was doing this until he said something. I was still ambitious, going after my dreams, but I would also put his needs before my own. Not because he asked me to but because I was raised to do that. I saw my mom put her needs in the back burner while she made sure everyone else was taken care of. This taught me that as a woman, as a Latina, I have to sacrifice myself, be overly available, be overly nice and understanding in order to be loved and to be useful. As I’m writing this I’m honestly just like what in the actual fuck?
When I was younger my parents didn’t allow me to have a boyfriend or go on dates. The more my parents told me no, the more that I wanted a relationship. That was the start of my unhealthy boundaries with men. While my parents were trying to protect me, not allowing me to date did not help with my development. I felt behind compared to other women when I went to college. I didn’t know how to set healthy boundaries with men. I was hyper focused on dating. And I was putting their needs before my own. Not having conversations with young girls about sex, consent, boundaries, and dating can lead them to choose partners that are toxic or put themselves in dangerous situations.
According to this Hispanic Research Center, 39% of Latinas born in the US are married by the age 20. And Latinas of Mexican descents born in the United States are more likely to experience intimate partner violence (16.7%) compared to Mexican immigrants (13.4%). I’m 27 now and I’ve forgiven my parent’s for their mishaps. However, I can’t deny how the lack of autonomy, verbal and physical affection from them led me to look for it somewhere else. With men who were emotionally unavailable and sometimes verbally abusive. Now I don’t want you to think that all the men I’ve dated were like this. Definitely not. But I noticed a pattern within myself and the men I would fall for. I recently read Cunt by Inga Muscio and this quote stood out to me, “When I became sexually active with men, sex wasn’t what I wanted at all. I wanted love and affection.”
Lots of girls grow up thinking the way to be loved is to fuck because our culture holds that affection is part and parcel to gettin’ down.”
Remember mamas you are whole by yourself and just the way you are! The same way you love, fuck and go on dates with your partner, you should also be loving, fucking and dating yourself. We don’t owe men anything. But we do owe ourselves everything.
Con Amor,
Lorena
Arousal:
💦 💦 💦 💦 💦
Battery Life:
🔋🔋🔋🔋
Price:
💲💲
I was a bit hesitant about the Romp Shine X Clit stimulator, but I was very surprised! One of my favorite parts about this sex toy is that the pulses are gentle! I’ve used other clit stimulators and they were a bit too rough for me but the pleasure air technology on this one really got me hooked! The Romp Shine X is perfect for solo play. I wouldn’t recommend this one for partner play because it’s a little thick.
Political Pussy 🐱
Stay informed with all things pleasure, reproductive justice, women’s health and sexual health around the globe!
A Day In The Life 💁🏻♀️
✨ I was on the Café Con Pam Podcast! Tune in here: Apple, Spotify
✨ Make sure you follow me on Instagram & Tiktok
@lorenarbanda Another attack on abortion access…#texas #womeninpolitics #reproductiverights #atx #sanantonio #dallastx #htx
Thank you for reading!
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